I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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