as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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