Tell her she can't have a vagina
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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