genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
No subtext here. People are naked.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
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