you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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