I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
