mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
