This girl is more easily done than said...
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize