I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize