oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
