does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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