A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
