My nipple is on Facebook.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
