Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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