This girl is more easily done than said...
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
