I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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