I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I think i peed on brittanys purse
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
