i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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