It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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