He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
you inspire me to be a worse person
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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