dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
