Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
