he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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