Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
