Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
