Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
