how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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