it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
