Your face is a jimmy john
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
