ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize