his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
