Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize