Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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