there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize