ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
