If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
