I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
