I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Come see our sink grown plant.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
