how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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