on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Someone signed my nipple.
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