38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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