he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
