With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
