Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
