so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
i think i just lost a toe
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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