omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
