My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
