My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
