It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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