Plan B is the new Plan A
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
