And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
